The Third Side of the Coin: Making the Right Choices

By Marielle Siy

Proving that there is much more than what meets the eye, public speaker and author Mr. Francis J. Kong gave a talk entitled, Winners and Losers: Your Choice of Success at the Medicine Cinematorium of the St. Martin de Porres building last July 23, 2010.

Welcome… to the World of the Unemployed

Perhaps it is already an undisputed fact that the glorious acapella rendition of Amazing Grace by Charlene Tabora (IV-9) is incomparable to other past impromptu performances within the four corners of the medicine building. Using this example, Mr. Kong segued into a smooth transition which proved to be the starting point of the talk’s introduction: “Ang galing ng taong marunong mag-improvise eh. Napansin ko nakahanda na lahat, pagkatapos ayaw umandar yung pirated DVD…and then she sang out, acapella—and turned out to be better. Ganun po ang buhay. You have everything planned out and then suddenly [other countries have closed their doors to] nurses.” As he engaged the audience with his intuitive prowess, Mr. Kong loosened up the atmosphere with good-humored jokes and anecdotes. The response was enthusiastic and immediate; clearly no one was doing the half-conscious naps anymore. So the talk began.

“HABIT ‘yan!”

“These people today—are the products of the choices they make from day to day”, he continued, “Ladies and gentlemen, the thoughts you think, the choices you make, the decisions you take, the actions you do today will define the kinds of life you would have tomorrow.” Carefully enunciating point by point, Mr. Kong tackled timely subjects involving everything from the current situation of nursing unemployment down to the rampant issue of undisciplined jaywalkers crossing the littered streets of the metropolis. By pointing out the relevance and explaining the inner dynamics currently embedded in the Filipino psyche, Mr. Kong adeptly explained the role of the Filipino’s deeply ingrained cultural habits to the hindrance of success despite our country’s advantageous position in terms of natural and human resources. He further stresses this point by citing the difference between the Philippines, which is still a third world country, and Singapore, which, despite its lack of natural resources, is now able to stand as a first world country with a booming economy to match.

An Eagle that Soars Alone

By now, the seniors who have attended the seminar have most probably learned by heart the four points that remain at the central core of his message. These are: (1) Be a lifelong learner, (2) Your attitude is more important than your skills, (3) Be true to yourself, and (4) Be in control. While cleverly peppering these points with funny dialogues and significant examples, Mr. Kong was still able to drive his point home by constantly interacting with his audience and discussing relevant issues that typically plague college students in different facets of life such as relationships, academics, and attitude towards life. In providing insights about life, success and meaningful living, he said, “We always pay for the choices we make. You are free to make your own choices. Nobody can stop you from making them, but you are unfree to escape the consequences”.

“You gotta be real. Magpakatotoo ka. Don’t force yourself to be somebody you’re not meant to be”, he further explores. There was certain honesty in his tone and voice that, for the past hour, the audience’s attention has remained perceptively unwavering. It was in this light of shared experiences that he continued to share his synthesized version of lessons in life derived from personal experience. In the latter part of the seminar, he went on to discuss the importance of forgiveness and moving forward: “When you go out there and you start working, there will be people who will hurt you. There will be people who will disappoint you. But if you keep holding on to that hurt, you’ll never be able to move forward. No one can move forward unless the eyes are taken away from the rearview mirror.” He goes on to tackle the subject of realizing your uniqueness and following your dreams: “[This is now] the struggle: If you want to be excellent in what you do, you are like an eagle—because an eagle soars high. But the challenge is [that] the eagle soars alone. Those who can’t fly high, there are many; and they’re loud and noisy…and they want to try to pull the eagle down […]” Ending on a positive note, Mr. Kong presented two short videos that undoubtedly tugged at the heartstrings of many, therefore providing a perfect conclusion to the two and a half hour talk for that afternoon.

The program was organized by the NCBS with advisers Mr. Gian Torres, RN, MAN and Mrs. Ma. Victoria Bongar, RN with Dane Gustilo and Bianca Lopez as the hosts who moderated the event. After the talk, Assistant Dean Mrs. Susan Maravilla, RN, MAN shared her experiences in relation to having the courage to triumph over the fear of living and making mistakes: “Just when you think you cannot do it, do it. Opportunity may only knock once, so don’t be afraid to grab it. You may not always succeed, but at least you did you best, no regrets. ‘Life is what we make of it,’ according to Mr. Kong,” she said, showing off her autographed copy of Mr. Kong’s book. It became apparent that these lessons were not for the young alone; instead, it seemed to span different perceptions, thoughts and experiences. The talk had become a success.

Knowing, Learning, Doing. These are just some of the things that have left a deep impression on me and to many others who have listened to him that day. Somehow, I couldn’t help thinking what would’ve happened if the students weren’t enforced to attend this seminar (a euphemistic way of saying four times make-up duty for the seniors), but I think it’d be safe to say they surely would have missed out on something truly great… plus the extra time in the hospital ward, of course.

A Short Interview with Mr. Francis J. Kong

NJ: How did you find the nursing community here?

FK: Very dynamic, very intelligent, very interesting, very talented.

NJ: What makes this seminar different from others you have conducted?

FK: [Even] at the very start, everybody’s very responsive. You know when people say that a speaker is very inspiring, one thing they fail to understand is speakers, like me, we derive our energy and inspiration from the crowd.

NJ: What’s your message to the nursing community?

FK: You’re gonna be meeting a lot of challenges along the way, but sometimes there is a need to know where you came from. For example, if you’re going through one way and everything seems to be blocking you, try to remember where you came from. The fact is there are thousands who want to study in [the] UST School of Nursing yet only a few of them are admitted every year. That in itself makes you understand that you are special. You’re not part of the major group. So there must be something in you that you can use. Whether it’s in nursing or not, those qualities will have to come out and then use them. […] don’t be afraid to take challenges and never allow idleness to creep up on you. Every single moment should be used to invest on activities that will add value to your success goal.